Ways People Cope With Stress That End Up Making It Worse

Talking about stress with friends can feel cathartic, and social support genuinely matters for wellbeing. But research — including work by psychologist Brad Bushman — suggests that venting without any move toward problem-solving or emotional processing can actually increase rather than reduce negative emotion. Replaying the same frustrations repeatedly, a pattern sometimes called co-rumination, tends to keep the stress response active rather than winding it down. The key distinction isn't whether you talk about stress, but whether the conversation moves toward perspective, support, or action — or just loops back to the same grievance.

Avoidance is one of the most well-documented maladaptive coping strategies in clinical psychology. When something feels overwhelming — an email, a conversation, a decision — not dealing with it brings immediate relief. But avoidance also prevents the kind of habituation and problem-solving that actually reduces stress over time. Worse, the avoided task tends to loom larger in the mind the longer it's postponed, increasing anxiety around it. This pattern is closely linked to how anxiety is commonly misunderstood — avoidance often masquerades as self-care when it's actually reinforcing the fear.

Passive media consumption — endlessly scrolling social media or watching hours of television — is one of the most common modern stress responses. In small doses it can provide a genuine mental break. But extended passive scrolling is associated with increased anxiety and low mood, partly because it crowds out more restorative activities like sleep, movement, or meaningful social connection. Digital habits that quietly erode mental wellbeing are easy to overlook precisely because they feel like resting — but passive consumption is rarely as restorative as it seems.

When something is worrying you, asking a trusted person for reassurance feels sensible. And occasional reassurance is a normal part of human connection. But repeatedly seeking confirmation that everything will be okay — especially without addressing the underlying concern — tends to be a short-lived fix. Research on anxiety and reassurance-seeking suggests that the relief it provides is temporary, and frequent reassurance can actually lower a person's tolerance for uncertainty over time, making anxiety worse rather than better. Sitting with uncertainty, while uncomfortable, is often a more effective long-term strategy.

Reaching for comfort food, a glass of wine, or another substance after a hard day is culturally normalized and emotionally intuitive. These substances can temporarily dampen the stress response, which is precisely why they're so easy to rely on. But using alcohol or food as primary stress management tools carries well-documented risks: disrupted sleep, physical health impacts, and — with alcohol in particular — the potential for dependence. Research also shows that alcohol, despite feeling relaxing initially, often increases anxiety and cortisol levels in the hours after consumption. Relying on substances to decompress also delays developing more sustainable coping skills.

Trying to analyze, rationalize, or reason yourself out of stress seems productive — but excessive rumination (dwelling on problems without moving toward resolution) is one of the strongest predictors of both anxiety and depression. The mind can convince itself that thinking harder about a problem is useful, even when the same thoughts are cycling without progress. Techniques like scheduled worry time, writing thoughts down to externalize them, or shifting to action-oriented thinking are better-supported approaches than open-ended rumination. Emotional regulation strategies can help interrupt these loops.